"Buy this abandoned hoarder's house, and you could win... A NEW CAR!!!"

"Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo" (thetomselleck) 01/24/2018 at 10:00 • Filed to: Houses

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Behold:

I do admire the sense of humor though.

I wonder what kind of car — oh.

You’d be crazy NOT to buy this home!

!!! UNKNOWN CONTENT TYPE !!!

mazda616 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:09

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Two hundred grand for that? Kentucky property values have spoiled me. That’d be 50-60k here.

LOREM IPSUM > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:10

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Offer the book value of the ‘Yorker for the whole lot.

BigBlock440 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:11

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My grandparents always drove those New Yorkers, they had 3 of them that I remember. Pretty comfy.

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:20

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i do love finding random crap whenever i move into a new house.... but.. thats a little much for me..

(when i moved into my current house i found the attic full of boxes of travel sized liquor bottles unopened... and monopoly money scattered everywhere... and one of these guys standing in the middle of it all)

was a little strange

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > mazda616 01/24/2018 at 10:21

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It’ll go for way over $200,000 actually...

Flavien Vidal > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:23

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Living in Japan, this looks like pocket change compared to prices here haha... I used to live in Edmonds-Lynnwood... Prices over there feel like Christmas presents now :)

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:25

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If that was in vancouver it’d be $2M+

fintail > mazda616 01/24/2018 at 10:27

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Yeah, that’s actually underpriced to start a bidding war. It could go for 50% more. If it was in Seattle especially north of 90, it’d bring 4x over asking.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > mazda616 01/24/2018 at 10:28

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And that is in a pretty cheap/rough neighborhood in a city that is considered rough/cheap in general. Even then it’ll probably go for more. If it was ~15 miles to the south it’d be worth 2.5x the asking, at least. Another 5 and it’d be worth about 3.5x the asking. Another 5 and it’d be worth 5+x the asking.

Welcome to the greater Seattle housing market.

benjrblant > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:29

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Ugh. Trying not to think about how bad this crap is in Denver too.

promoted by the color red > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:29

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I found a similar situation in my town except the house came with a desirable car: a 5MT NA Miata.

Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:29

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Step 1: Buy house.

Step 2: Make a deal with a thrift shop that they can keep anything they want, as long as everything gets removed before a certain date.

Step 3: Hire a cleaning crew.

Step 4: Sell house for $250k while keeping the Chrysler.

Step 5: 572R swap the Chrysler since you’re now at about -$40k on the cost.

Step 6: Enter Lemons with the most Roadkill car ever. Can’t corner worth a darn, but the straights become brutal. Don’t take any penalty laps since at this point the car’s cost is about -$20k.

fintail > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:31

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I was thinking the lot size must be a typo - apparently not.

What will it bring, 300K? Not exactly full of high dollar collectibles or a vintage car, but I suppose a late run K-based NYer is rare if it actually runs and drives.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 01/24/2018 at 10:31

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In Seattle it’d be about the same, except in USD.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 01/24/2018 at 10:33

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ugh, so mental.

We should all move to Halifax or somewhere in flyover country in the US and establish an Oppo Enclave.

Stapleface > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:34

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So, basically Grandma died and the next of kin don’t feel like cleaning out her house (once they tossed it for any valuables). Just sell it all and let the next schlub worry about it.

Rust and Dust - Oppositelock Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:35

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“Winner takes all.”

Plot twist: The seller is the winner.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 10:35

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Storage Wars is those dudes that buy storage units to resell the contents. It’s like a mini deadliest catch with fewer crabs.

This looks like Hoarders, but you have to hire your own cleaning crew.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 01/24/2018 at 10:38

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I’d almost be down for Halifax, but wouldn’t somewhere in Newfoundland be cheaper? I guess the benefit of NS is that there is a bridge to everything.

Then again, it gets freaky cold in these places. I prefer my temperate weather here.

Stapleface > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 01/24/2018 at 10:39

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That’s not strange, that’s awesome.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 01/24/2018 at 10:42

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Newfoundland would be cheaper, yeah. Maybe we can all get together and buy some bankrupt town in Washington or OR?

fintail > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 01/24/2018 at 10:45

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Plenty of cheap land on the Olympic peninsula, south of Olympia, or east of the Cascades.

farscythe - makin da cawfee! > Stapleface 01/24/2018 at 10:46

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that too.... but it did make me wonder what the hell the previous tennants were doing up there....lol

Sovande > mazda616 01/24/2018 at 11:02

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Cost of living. My suspicion is average salaries are not great in Kentucky. That would be about a $600,000 house in my neighborhood, for instance.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > fintail 01/24/2018 at 11:03

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The only reason I don’t live on the Olympic Peninsula is that there is so little to do out there... If you’re not in the right industry, the area is in a perpetual recession. For every other reason I could think of, I’d rather live there.

fintail > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 01/24/2018 at 11:06

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I know what you mean. My mom lives on the coast. Great for retirees, and for some reason, she likes it - but a terrible employment picture, and the weather can be a bit damp, they get about twice as much rain as the Seattle metro. Also, going to a Costco or a full service hospital is a long drive.

I feel the same about eastern WA - if my job moved over, I’d take it in an instant. Nicer weather, lots of decent empty roads, affordable housing. Just gotta work on the jobs.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 11:10

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I mean you will never have to buy Christmas wrapping paper again.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 01/24/2018 at 11:14

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You know what’s funny... Looking through these photos, this home is in surprisingly good shape. That attic is flawless.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 01/24/2018 at 11:17

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Pretty though, I enjoy coming down and just driving endlessly around Washington.

S62B50daily > farscythe - makin da cawfee! 01/24/2018 at 11:18

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They were cracking nuts

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > fintail 01/24/2018 at 11:19

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I don’t mind the rain at all and would prefer that to traffic & the hot part of the summer. If I had the option to move out there in 2013, I would have moved there without the slightest reluctance... My trips out there and to the San Juans are why I moved up here.

Even out there housing prices have risen due to the overall housing market insanity...

For Sweden > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 11:21

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That’s a pretty good deal for Everett, no?

fintail > Eric @ opposite-lock.com 01/24/2018 at 11:24

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My old car doesn’t like rain - trying to keep rust at bay. I am also a tad OCD about keeping a car clean. I don’t really mind rain otherwise. But I also like the distinct seasons and landforms east of the mountains.

Many sales where my mom lives are to out of area buyers, and there are many absentee owners and landlords. I’ve thought of buying something there and renting it out, but I fear drama, and the ROI might not work, as I don’t have any plans to move there even with a house owned free and clear. Prices have risen, but houses that were 90K 25 years ago might be 160K now (that describes my mom’s prior house), so it is still reasonable. 300K will buy something exceptional.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Demon-Xanth knows how to operate a street. 01/24/2018 at 11:26

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Except this will probably go for at least 300k...

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > For Sweden 01/24/2018 at 11:27

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Unfortunately yes

mazda616 > Sovande 01/24/2018 at 11:33

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Yeah. I am middle class here and in an area like Seattle, I’d be in poverty.

Spaceball-Two > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 11:37

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HEY! Shitty house flips is my game. You back to inspecting chandeliers!

Akio Ohtori - RIP Oppo > mazda616 01/24/2018 at 11:37

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Ditto Tulsa. Especially right off a major street like that I’d say $70k tops.

You’re right though, it is in shockingly good condition, if very dated.

Deal Killer - Powered by Focus > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 11:40

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That is in no way, shape or form a “hoarder” house. I can see the floors, all the walls, and there isn’t shit piled three feet high on the kitchen counters. It’s just your typical “Estate” type home, where Grandma never updated anything in the last 30-40 years. Rent a dumpster to toss the useless crap, then donate all the salvageable stuff to Good Will.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 01/24/2018 at 12:00

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It just hasn’t been updated since 1978.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Spaceball-Two 01/24/2018 at 12:29

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D: